The Value of Venting or Sh** Journalling

The Value of Venting or Sh** Journalling

The journal that you write your gratitude in is gorgeous.  

The one that you carry in your bag, at your bedside or keep on your desk is plump with ideas, musings and inspiration, and has the most decadent feel to it, in all ways.  

The writing instrument which you use to write the words of thanks, wax poetic about your intentions and mind map your inspirations is not merely a pen, but a vessel from which your own energy flows from and onto the pages of those sacred books.

Those journals, in all their beauty and masterpiece, are containers, preserving all the good thoughts and things documented about You and Your Life and Your Dreams.

So where do you document your angst, your tizzy, your discomfort.  

On those days when you are listening to a monologue from your gremlins?  The eye rolling, the disdain, the What The …?

There is a journal for that….drumroll please…

Introducing the “Sh** Journal”!!

The Sh** Journal is where you write with whatever marker, crayon, pen, pencil or finger dipped in peanut butter.

You write whatever sh** is running through your mind, that is fast tracking your moment, your morning, afternoon, evening, day, two days, week and beyond into the depths.  

The pages will be a safe place in which to express your sh**, your fire, brimstone and disdain. 

It is where you articulate thoughts like:

 

  • The “I suck, let me count the ways!” soliloquy,
  • The “What on earth made me think I could do this?” tirade,
  • The “Are you freaking kidding me?” moments,
  • The “Really…Seriously…This is happening?” and other drips of sarcasm,
  • The why I should practise, “Would you like fries with that?” monologue.

 

Where you can pose philosophic questions like:

 

  • Who gives a Sh**?
  • Why do I give a Sh**?
  • Is this really my Sh**?
  • Why is this Sh** running through my mind?

 

There’s more…write about when you think you are or feel like the Sh**ty:

 

  • boss,
  • leader,
  • parent, 
  • partner, 
  • spouse, 
  • friend, 
  • consumer,
  • driver etc.

WHY DO IT  

We have 60,000 thoughts per day, and lets be honest they are not all affirmations.  Its when one of those “I Suck” themed thoughts grabs our attention, then it invites a friend, and the friend invites a friend and suddenly its gone viral.   One simple thought morphed into a stadium filled with these self-deprecating, confidence busting, and alignment kinking thoughts. 

The longer we ignore them, the more come to the party. So get them out of your head, its like crowd control, calling security or 911 for assistance.

HOW TO DO IT

1.  GRAB WHATEVER PAPER IS HANDY

 

You are welcome to go out and buy THE most unattractive to you journal to have at the ready.  You can even doodle or collage a picture of what your gremlin looks like and add it to the back page.  Therefore when you write pressing down as hard as you can its like a voodoo energy towards that monster.  **Don’t forget to add horns or other adornments that further embellish that image.

 

Also, there is nothing stopping you from grabbing scrap paper from the recycle bin and just going to town.  Make it as easy as possible.

 

2.  WRITE WITHOUT STOPPING 

 

Or lifting the pen.  Write with absolute abandon, the faster you write those thoughts and get them out the better.

  

 

DO NOT edit, correct, punctuate…VENT!  Go with the flow.  Its not a presentation, dissertation or speech.   

 

Why not type it in a document on your laptop then delete it?  Read this article on why handwriting makes you smarter.

 

 

3.  EYE-ROLLING, SNEERING, SCOWLING ENCOURAGED

 

Get into the process, whether its rolling your eyes, sneering, snuffling, scowling or mimicking with your mouth what the face of those thoughts look like as you write them out.

 

Adding facial expressions while you are writing goes further get that energy out of you as you write is doubly cathartic.

 

4. SAY THANK YOU 

 

Once you have purged and vented all the Sh**, write Thank You to close.

 

I know you are thinking, “What the….?”  

 

You have just vented it out, every sh**ty detail.

 

How do you feel now?  Relief? Exhausted? Refreshed?

 

What’s happening inside that beautiful head of yours now?  

 

Is it possible that steam roller is no longer making pass after pass flattening your energy, self-esteem, self-worth, and confidence?  

 

Have you every had this experience when talking to a friend, whereas you were given the space to vent or been that friend?  What did you say at the end?  Probably thank you for letting me get that off my mind. 

 

Thank you is closing the loop, its completing the process.

 

5.  LET IT GO

 

Rip the papers out of said unattractive to you journal, tear them into itty bitty bits, feed them to the shredder, or if possible set a match to them (in a safe, well ventilated area taking all the precautions when setting something afire).  

 

Feel free to do a tantrum tap dance on top of them before sending them off to their final resting place.

 

Keeping them serves no value.

 

Keeping them makes it possible for confidentiality to be compromised.

 

Keeping them is like keeping those thoughts.

 

Let them go with another dose of gratitude and a dash of Love.

 

Why Love?  Well, you may have learned something in your Sh** journalling, you may have learned that the stadium of thoughts had a common denominator called Fear.

 

Fear that those things were factual.  (Fear = False Evidence Appearing Real)

 

Adding love to the letting go process is more for YOU so that you can replenish what had been steam rolled earlier.  

 

AND FINALLY

Big Inhale

and

Big Exhale

 

 

Trust me, when you have been hosting all that Sh** in your head you were breathing shallowly and now that its out we can get back to business.  So freshen up and reset the body, mind and spirit by taking 3-5 big deep breaths.

 

Now you can get back to the business of being your awesome self, loving your fabulous thoughts and all sorts of other Good Sh**

The Expatriate to Repatriate Journey:  Turning Our World Upside Down…Again

The Expatriate to Repatriate Journey: Turning Our World Upside Down…Again

In the last 4 years I’ve moved a couple times.

At a Glance:

  • 2010 Canada to Germany, 
  • 2012 Germany to Australia, 
  • 2014 Australia to Canada.

That is a lot of moving, packing, purging, Kilometers, and change!

The decision process to move takes a great deal of endurance.  Whether its across town and especially to another continent.  

It is possible that from the outside looking in, it may appear that casually over coffee one morning we just decided to pick up and relocate… and poof there we landed on the other side of the Globe.  No muss no fuss.  

When the energy around making a continental move is well a Continental Shift!

When you are keen and eager to relocate, the physical move is a fairly straight forward. And may look similar to this…

When you are hesitant to relocate, the physical move is substantially more scribbly. Like this…

Either route gets you from A to B. 

As with any major decision there is a tremendous amount of 

  • back and forth, 
  • pros and cons, 
  • ups and downs,
  • tears of joy and sadness
  • along with various and other sundry emotions.  

Think Roller Coaster, and that ride doesn’t necessarily stop when you land.
When you arrive at B, you have to start to unpack and untangle what you brought with you, whether you knew you brought it along or not.  

Its a process, just like any move.

You have to decide where stuff will go and how it will fit; one box at a time.  Not just your furniture but yourself. 

Inventory:  Choosing Forgiveness

Inventory: Choosing Forgiveness

After writing the post Creating
Space Within by Choosing Forgiveness
, I’ve been noticing a
definite shift in my vibeage.  
Credit:  Reposting image from Good Vibe University Facebook Page
In the spirit of “letting things go” I’ve been drawn to take care of some of
those “niggling” things that have been in lying in wait for my
attention and weighing on me.

Since writing

  • I’ve cleaned out
    my purse (now substantially and literally lighter),
  • I’ve cleaned out
    my fridge and just like the car analogy when I open it I love the tidy and
    shiny look,
  • I’ve organized
    my pantry,
  • I’ve created a
    stack of things to put in the Post.  Cards that I’ve been meaning to
    write, pictures I’ve been meaning to send, and little odds and ends that
    I’ve had on my mind but kept sloughing them off.
  • I’ve sorted out
    the tangle of shoes at our entry and discarded ones that have been waiting
    to be released.
  • I’ve got a tidy
    uncluttered desk.
  • I’ve sorted
    through and found homes for papers that have been stuck on the bench top
    purgatory and now have a home.
  • And a couple
    more items along the same theme.
  • Interesting Note is that all of the things I took care of were out of sight but not out of mind.  
I ended the day feeling accomplished and the best part was that it
had all been an organic process.  I’ve been known to whip myself into a cleaning frenzy and channel my inner
whirlwind.  However it just started with
one thing, then segued into the next, with a calm, cool, and productive and
meditative rhythm.
Having addressed most of my items on my “should-do” list, and if
you haven’t heard, One should never should on oneself. In addition to feeling accomplished
I and my environment felt lighter.
  
Throughout the next 30 days I intend to create more of that good
feeling.
Day One –  Inventory
It’s necessary to reflect on the past and acknowledge and identify
who, what and specifically the feelings that are being held onto that  are full of negative
stuff. 
This is my exercise in consciously choosing forgiveness, therefore
I am requiring myself to consciously take stock of all that needs to be let go
of.
Word of Caution:  This is
not permission to don your judge’s robes, grab your gavel and start casting
judgment.  Nor is this an exercise to envelop
you and your past in a shroud of victimization.

I am not seeking retribution from others; I am choosing to release the
attachment to and the belief of, that holding onto any past angers, hurts, embarrassments,
etc is serving me.

The only service it is providing is to create restrictions in my
life and hold me back.  Sustaining the
clench takes away more energy than it would ever give and limits flexibility. 
Inhale Peace
Exhale Love
Inhale Now
Exhale Then
Inale Peace
Exhale Love…

Couples Therapy:  My Relationship with Procrastination

Couples Therapy: My Relationship with Procrastination

It took a long time of struggling with the push and pull dynamics of the relationship to finally ask myself:
  • How had I allowed myself to be bullied for so long?  
  • When had I given up so much power over myself?  
  • And how could I release this hold on me?  

Being caught in this vortex was not serving my purpose. 

The need for change was imminent.  
Or was it?
It seemed futile to look for balance in a relationship, such as this, when the common ground felt as stable as quicksand.  I needed to step onto the sidelines of the blame game and determine what my role was in all of it.  Along with my new found conviction to make a change, I set off armed with fresh eyes, an open heart and a clean slate to begin anew.
Determined, I moved forward, seemingly unaware of the subtlety of the seduction, the light and easy suggestions, the whispered ideas luring me to come out and play.  The gentle urgings, the innocent voice, the promise of “it will only take a moment; you’ll be back on point right away.”  
The mastermind I was dealing with worked easily and effortlessly to derail my intentions.  
The initial moment was drawn out with the cajoling of, “Just one more minute, what’s one more minute?…You can make up the time later.”  
Those are not the demands of a bully, they are simple requests or so I led myself to believe.  Once the realization came I was furious.  It wasn’t just a moment, it wasn’t just another minute, I had been duped yet again by the exponential growth of a single moment into the whole loss of a day.
I berated myself, I belittled myself, I was angry at myself for being led. Angry at the apparent ease I had succumbed to distraction.  
Where were my fresh eyes, my open heart? 
I looked at my clean slate with disdain, now smudgy with taunts of distracted success by procrastination.  Chaos ensued.
Chaos had become a common ingredient in my life and it reigned in my world more times than not. In turn I welcomed chaos as I began to notice and accept that I thrived within its outer appearance of frantic disorder.  
That feeling of being more grounded as I stood amid the eye of the storm, more productive, more decisive, more clear and more successful to get my tasks done.  I began to relish in my many accomplishments handled and realized that I create chaos for my greater good.  Then it hit me.  
If chaos was a direct descendant of procrastination how could I love one and not the other?
I had found my piece in this dysfunctional relationship and now I could make my peace.
Procrastination had firmly established a place in my life, and for years I had rejected its value.  I had adopted the attitude that we could not work together, either I was on top or on the bottom, no balance. 
I was attempting to keep track of wins and losses and each time I checked the scoreboard I was always behind.  My feeling like a victim in the relationship only served to feed procrastination’s power over me.  The imminent change I needed to make was not one of overpowering my opponent, rather to embrace the challenges procrastination presented me.

I wanted procrastination to do the work to change.

I wanted procrastination to leave me alone so I could relinquish the guilt I felt when I listened to the whispers.

I wanted procrastination to respect my productivity rather than seducing me away from it.

I wanted peace! And procrastination was not giving it to me.

Making peace with something is akin to forgiveness.  The process is to accept what is in its natural state, not being in agreement, condoning it or in opposition to it, but to find neutral ground from which to move forward from.  
Procrastination had been doing its job, and doing it well without fail.  It always led me to chaos which I admittedly embraced yet I continued to resist the journey with procrastination to get there.
The relationship looks and feels different now that I have accepted procrastination for what it is.  
In my opinion, it is a momentary meandering off the path, or coloring outside of the lines as a means to an end.  I have chosen to view procrastination as a gift to myself and gently allow myself to wander for moments at its request.  
I have given myself permission to get to the end result without fear of veering off my predetermined path and know that procrastination allows me a bit more time for mulling or creating before the destination is reached.  At times getting there may be chaotic and other times not, that works for me too.

Procrastination and I are cultivating that comfortable relationship known best by old friends rather than adversaries, most of the time.  

How do you face procrastination?

This is my favorite way of approaching things that have the putting it off vibe…